Donut Sleep: Hole-In-The-Middle Insomnia
So virtually my entire family has sleeping problems that seem to commence in our early 30s. It happens so often we have a term for it: Donut sleep. Because there’s …
Barbie: Life in the NutHouse
Just Hit Your Sister And Get It Over With Already
One day my girls just Would Not Stop arguing… Delilah: Mom! Tell her to stop! Charlotte: It’s your fault! Delilah: Stop TOUCHING me! Charlotte: You started it! Me: *has had …
All Barbie Needs Is A Pole
I’m conflicted about Barbie – the real one, not this alpha version that seems to epitomize my personality. I oddly like her, but she needs someone besides the Golden Globe …
Think Bill Murray in Caddyshack
Actual conversation with a guy at Home Depot after dropping $700 at the dealership. For the second time – in 4 days… Home Depot guy, Victor: Can I help …
Momming and Midnight Vomit
You know what’s awesome? Your kids. You know what’s not awesome? Vomit. Vomit is not awesome. I remember finding out I was pregnant. *sighhhh* The daydreams. All the wonder and …
Drive by Lullabies
Delilah: Mom, I can’t sleep. Will you sing us a lullaby? Me: Seriously? You hated when I sang to you. And you’re like almost in college or something (not really). …